Sermon: Forgiving Myself

9/13/09 Destructive Attitudes Most Difficult to Change: Forgiving Myself 1 John 1:5-10

The inability to experience forgiveness – God’s forgiveness or our forgiveness of ourselves – destroys our sense of happiness and fulfillment. That sense of guilt – the feeling that something or someone is out to get us – causes us to live tentatively instead of abundantly as God wishes us to live.

We’re always watching the next step. Always wondering, when we’ll get paid back. Rather than living abundantly as God says.

The Key to forgiveness is confession – being honest – saying the same thing about sin God says about sin.

We face the problem of not forgiving ourselves

1 John 1:5-10 – This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.

What is forgiveness?
• If we confess our sins, He is faithful to us and forgives us
• Forgiveness is the result of a payment for a sin
• Atonement: payment
• Romans 3:21-28 – But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus. Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded. On what principle? On that of observing the law? No, but on that of faith. For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law.
o Comes through faith in Jesus Christ, not in ourselves
o For all people sin and fall short of the glory of God
o Are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Jesus Christ
o Through faith in His Blood, being Just
• Christianity is a peculiar faith
o Foolishness, gentile
o A righteousness we do not deserve, but receive
• Matthew 26:28 – This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.
o To take away sins
• Luke 4:18 – “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed”
o “Release” the oppressed
• Luke 24:46-47 – He told them, “This is what is written: The Christ will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance and forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.”
o Repentance and forgiveness of sins
o Taking away of one sins
• Acts 10:43 – All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.
o Forgiveness through faith
• Ephesians 1:7 – In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace
• Galatians 1:13-14 – For you have heard of my previous way of life in Judaism, how intensely I persecuted the church of God and tried to destroy it. I was advancing in Judaism beyond many Jews of my own age and was extremely zealous for the traditions of my fathers.
o Cross and payment for sins go together
• Hebrews 10:15-18 – The Holy Spirit also testifies to us about this. First he says: "This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds." Then he adds: "Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more. “And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.”
o No price we can pay for forgiveness
o No reason for me to be afraid that something will make me pay that price
o No sacrifice I can pay for it
• Forgiveness and atonement go together
• Forgiveness is release from guilt
• Romans 8:1-4 – Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit.
• God became human, took all our sins, took it to the cross, buried and rose again
• No other faiths believe God would become human
• Colossians 2:14 – having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross.
o Impossible to live a perfect life
o Jesus took it all away
• Continues to take it away
• Hebrews 10:14 – because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy
• Justification: just as if I’d never sinned, declared not guilty even though I’ve done wrong
• Sanctification: because I have been declared not guilty, I’ll learn how to live as a Christian committed life
• By one sacrifice we’ve been made perfect forever and being made holy – becoming a different person

Why do we need forgiveness?
• We need forgiveness because of guilt
• A value system
• Guilt: everything in life has to be paid for
• Owing a debt that one knows that eventually must be paid
• Known as the great “black mailer”
• Always hurting others; give gifts to pay back
• Guilt makes us do things
• Sin has disappeared from our language systems
• Willful disobedience to God’s standards
• 1 John 3:4 – Everyone who sins breaks the law; in fact, sin is lawlessness
• Sin: breaking God’s law
o Sin is a barrier that separates us from God
o Slide across/ slip from slippery rode/temptation
o Lawlessness
o Debt or duty we owe to God or others
• Pushing God to the side

Why do we have difficulty with forgiveness?
• We have difficulty because we deny we are sinners
• Not admitting we’ve done wrong, we rationalize by saying “everyone is doing it” or we feel undeserving of forgiveness
• Ephesians 2:9-10 – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
o Not by works, but faith through grace that we’re saved
• 1 Timothy 1:15-17 – Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.
• God displays forgiveness to us and to Paul (he felt he was the worst)
• Then God uses Paul to write most of the New Testament

How do we learn to forgive ourselves?

Use notes during devotion with Bible
Do it in quietness for a few minutes each day: whatever causes you to feel guilty/whatever your sin is, whatever you’ve done

1) Recognize that all have sinned
• Romans 3:23 – for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God
• All could not have sinned without our having sinned (that means all of us)
• Write down word “all” – that means me

2) Confess your sins
• 1 John 1:9 – If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness
• We make forgiveness more difficult than God does
• Simple word: if we confess: if we say the same thing that God says about sin then the Bible says he’s faithful and just and He will forgive us our sins.
• Doesn’t say we have to do anything (like make sacrifices, pay homage to Israel, cut your skin) to pay for our sins, just confess
• We have a hard time with that
• That’s why we rationalize it, because we have a hard time setting aside our pride and saying it’s a sin

3) God has done all to forgive us our sins
• God has done all that needs to be done to forgive us our sins
• Hebrews 9: 24-28 – For Christ did not enter a man-made sanctuary that was only a copy of the true one; he entered heaven itself, now to appear for us in God's presence. Nor did he enter heaven to offer himself again and again, the way the high priest enters the Most Holy Place every year with blood that is not his own. Then Christ would have had to suffer many times since the creation of the world. But now he has appeared once for all at the end of the ages to do away with sin by the sacrifice of himself. Just as man is destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, so Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many people; and he will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for him.
• Hebrews 10:8-10 – First he said, "Sacrifices and offerings, burnt offerings and sin offerings you did not desire, nor were you pleased with them" (although the law required them to be made). Then he said, "Here I am, I have come to do your will." He sets aside the first to establish the second. And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.
• Hebrews 10: 15-18 – The Holy Spirit also testifies to us about this. First he says:
“This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.” Then he adds: "Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more. "And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.
• Make notes, all have sinned, confess, God has done all!

4) “ACCEPT” your cleansing
• Don’t deny God the opportunity of His gift of grace
• That’s what He’s come to do
• For us to hang on to our sin, whatever it may be, just confess it, then accept the cleansing
• For us to think of the sin, just confess it, accept the cleansing


When we violate the laws of God, we suffer greatly. We experience guilt in our hearts and we bring harm to ourselves physically and emotionally, but forgiveness is the great restoring power in our relationships, the relationship between us and God.
Restores the relationship with others. Can enter into the life of freedom.
What a joy and freedom forgiveness brings to our spirits. The Psalmist rejoiced in his own forgiveness. It is by the pure love and mercy of Jesus Christ that forgiveness is offered. When we accept that forgives, God Promises, our guilty feelings are taken away.

Dr Phil Lineberger

Work your way through whatever that guilt sin is.